Working from home with kids is challenging, but incredibly rewarding if you have the correct plan of attack. This guide provides actionable strategies, real-world tips, and insights to help parents navigate the complexities of remote work while nurturing their children.
Understanding the Current Landscape of Remote Work and Families
The rise of work from home has created a new normal for many families. According to a recent study by the Pew Research Center, a significant portion of the U.S. workforce has transitioned to remote work, and many expect it to continue. This shift has its benefits, like increased flexibility and time with family. However, it also brings significant challenges, especially for parents juggling work responsibilities and childcare. It’s crucial to acknowledge this reality and proactively develop strategies to make it work.
Setting Realistic Expectations: You Can’t Do It All
The first and perhaps most vital step is to set realistic expectations. Many parents fall into the trap of trying to maintain pre-pandemic levels of productivity while simultaneously providing attentive childcare. This is often unsustainable. Acknowledge that your workday might look different now. You might need to adjust your work schedule, reduce your workload (if possible), or accept that you won’t accomplish everything on your to-do list every day. According to research at Stanford, expectations can dictate both job satisfaction and output so adjust them to fit your conditions. Don’t be afraid to ask for help from your partner, family members, or even consider hiring a part-time babysitter, if feasible. Remembering that it’s okay to not be perfect is half the battle.
Creating a Dedicated Workspace (Even a Small One!)
Having a dedicated workspace is essential for maintaining focus and productivity. Ideally, this would be a separate room with a door that you can close. However, if space is limited, even a small corner of a room can work. The key is to designate this area as your “work zone” and to train your children to respect it. Explain to them that when you’re in your workspace, you need to concentrate and can’t be disturbed unless it’s an emergency. Make it comfortable and efficient, with all the tools and resources you need within easy reach. This creates a mental boundary for both you and your kids. A dedicated space, even a makeshift one, signals “work time.”
Establishing a Daily Routine and Schedule
Children thrive on routine. Establishing a consistent daily schedule will not only help them feel more secure but also provide you with structured blocks of time for focused work. This schedule should include specific times for meals, naps, playtime, learning activities, and quiet time. When building a routine, take into consideration your child’s age and developmental stage. Toddlers, for example, have shorter attention spans and will require more frequent breaks and activities. Communicate the schedule clearly to your children, and post it in a visible place. Visual schedules can be particularly helpful for younger children. For older kids, you can involve them in the planning process to increase their buy-in.
Time Blocking: Your Secret Weapon
Time blocking is a powerful time management technique that can be incredibly helpful for work from home parents. Divide your day into blocks of time, assigning specific tasks to each block. For example, you might have a block for answering emails, a block for attending meetings, and a block for working on a specific project. When creating your time blocks, factor in your children’s needs and planned activities. Perhaps you schedule your most demanding tasks for times when your children are napping or engaged in independent play. Buffer time between blocks to handle unexpected interruptions. The Pomodoro Technique, a time management method using focused 25 minute intervals, can also be a great way to maximize blocks of work while taking short breaks.
Leveraging Nap Time and Quiet Time Effectively
Nap time and quiet time are your golden opportunities for focused work. Maximize these times by planning your most important tasks for these periods. Create a calm and relaxing environment to encourage your children to nap or engage in quiet activities. For younger children, this might involve reading a book, listening to calming music, or playing with quiet toys. For older children, you can provide them with books, puzzles, or art supplies. Set clear expectations for quiet time, and reward them for respecting these boundaries. Remember to communicate what constitutes quiet time. For example, that can include setting guidelines about what is allowed (reading, drawing, quiet games) versus what is not (watching TV, jumping around).
Choosing Age-Appropriate Activities
Keeping children entertained and engaged is crucial for preventing interruptions. Select age-appropriate activities that can keep them occupied for extended periods. For toddlers and preschoolers, consider activities like coloring, playing with blocks, reading picture books, or engaging in imaginative play. For older children, you can provide them with books, puzzles, board games, or art supplies. Online educational resources can also be a valuable tool. Many websites and apps offer interactive games and activities that can keep children entertained and learning. Just be sure to monitor their screen time and ensure that they’re engaging in age-appropriate content. Sites like PBS Kids and Khan Academy Kids provide age-tailored content.
Implementing Screen Time Strategically
While excessive screen time is generally discouraged, it can be a useful tool for work from home parents when used strategically. Consider using educational apps or websites to keep your children entertained and learning while you focus on work. Set clear boundaries regarding screen time, and ensure that your children understand the rules. For example, you might limit screen time to specific times of the day or require them to complete other activities before they can watch TV or play video games. Use parental control features to block inappropriate content. Balance screen time with other activities, like outdoor play, reading, and creative projects.
Communicating with Your Manager and Colleagues
Open and honest communication with your manager and colleagues is essential for making work from home with kids successful. Let them know about your situation and any potential challenges you might face. Be upfront about your availability and response times. If you need to adjust your work schedule or take time off to care for your children, communicate this clearly in advance. Most employers are understanding of the challenges faced by work from home parents and are willing to be flexible. Don’t be afraid to ask for support or accommodations when needed. If your company provides access to an Employee Assistance Program (EAP), take advantage of any resources related to childcare. Make sure to respond promptly and respectfully, demonstrating your continuing commitment to the employer. It establishes you as a reliable team member.
Mastering the Art of the Quick Break
Short, frequent breaks can be incredibly helpful for maintaining focus and preventing burnout. Use these breaks to connect with your children, address their needs, and recharge your batteries. Take a few minutes to read a book, play a game, or simply cuddle with your child. Even a five-minute break can make a big difference. Use these breaks to move around and stretch your body. Working from home can lead to a sedentary lifestyle, so it’s important to incorporate movement into your routine. A quick walk around the block or a few minutes of stretching can help improve your energy levels and reduce stress.
Creating a Signal for “Do Not Disturb”
Establish a clear and consistent signal to let your children know when you absolutely cannot be interrupted. This could be a sign on your door, a specific phrase, or even a special hat that you wear when you need to concentrate. Explain to your children what the signal means and the consequences of ignoring it. This will help them learn to respect your work time and minimize interruptions. Consider visual cues appropriate for your child’s age. For younger children, a red light could mean “Mommy/Daddy is working”. For older children, it might be a sign saying “In a Meeting”.
Incorporating Your Kids (When Appropriate)
While you can’t always incorporate your kids into your work, look for opportunities where you can. For example, if you’re attending a conference call, you might let your child sit quietly in the room and draw or read. If you’re working on a creative project, involve them in the process by asking for their input or letting them help with simple tasks. This can not only keep them entertained but also make them feel like they’re contributing and part of your work life. The key is to find a balance between involving them and maintaining your productivity. Sometimes, a surprise visit from a child on a video call can humanize your experience. Use this wisely and sparingly.
Embracing Flexibility and Adaptability
Working from home with kids requires flexibility and adaptability. Things won’t always go according to plan, and you’ll need to be prepared to adjust your schedule and strategies as needed. If a meeting unexpectedly runs long or your child suddenly gets sick, don’t panic. Take a deep breath, assess the situation, and come up with a solution. This might involve rescheduling a meeting, asking for help from a colleague, or simply taking some time off to care for your child. The ability to roll with the punches is essential for success.
Asking for Help from Your Support Network
Don’t be afraid to ask for help from your support network. This might include your partner, family members, friends, or neighbors. If you’re feeling overwhelmed, reach out to them for assistance. Perhaps they can watch your children for a few hours so you can focus on work, or maybe they can simply lend a listening ear. Building a strong support network can make a big difference in your ability to manage work and family responsibilities. Consider forming a childcare swap with other work from home parents in your area. This can provide you with free childcare while also giving your children opportunities to socialize and play with other kids.
Prioritizing Self-Care: You Can’t Pour From An Empty Cup
Taking care of yourself is essential for maintaining your physical and mental health. When you are properly taken care of, your attitude is more positive, and you have the energy to deal with anything that comes your way. Make sure to prioritize self-care activities, such as exercise, healthy eating, and getting enough sleep. Schedule these activities into your daily or weekly routine, just like you would schedule a work meeting. Find ways to de-stress and relax. This might involve reading a book, taking a bath, listening to music, or spending time in nature. Even a few minutes of mindfulness or meditation can help reduce stress and improve your overall well-being.
Navigating the Guilt: It’s Okay to Not Be Super-Parent
Many work from home parents experience feelings of guilt. They feel guilty for not being able to devote enough time to their work, and they feel guilty for not being able to devote enough time to their children. It’s important to recognize that these feelings are normal. Remind yourself that you’re doing the best you can. Don’t compare yourself to other parents or try to live up to unrealistic expectations. Focus on what you are doing right, and celebrate your successes. Communicate with your partner about your feelings, and work together to find solutions that work for both of you. It’s important that you are both on the same page. Sometimes parents get into a fight because of one’s beliefs with the other partner’s belief.
Strategies for Managing Virtual Meetings with Kids
Virtual meetings can be particularly challenging when you’re working from home with kids. Here are some strategies for managing them: Schedule meetings during nap time or quiet time whenever possible. Use a headset or noise-canceling headphones to minimize distractions. Inform your colleagues in advance that you have children at home and that there might be occasional interruptions. Keep a stash of toys or activities nearby to keep your children occupied during the meeting. Mute yourself when you’re not speaking to minimize background noise. If your child interrupts, calmly address the situation and then mute yourself again. Don’t be afraid to ask a childcare support or family member to watch your child during crucial meetings.
Creating a Flexible and Adaptable Meal Plan
Meal planning can be a lifesaver while working from home. Make a meal plan each week that includes quick and easy meals that can be prepared with minimal effort. Involve your children in the meal planning and preparation process. This can not only keep them entertained but also teach them valuable life skills. Consider using meal delivery services or ordering takeout on busy days to reduce the burden of cooking. Prepare snacks in advance and keep them readily available for your children to prevent hunger-related meltdowns. A prepared healthy snack is more convenient than running to the cupboard and letting your children eat whatever they like.
Finding the Right Childcare Solution
If possible, explore different childcare options to find the solution that works best for your family. This might include hiring a full-time or part-time nanny, enrolling your children in daycare, or utilizing after-school programs. Consider forming a childcare co-op with other work from home parents in your area. This can provide you with affordable and flexible childcare while also giving your children opportunities to socialize and play with other kids. If childcare is financially out of reach, talk to your family or trusted friend and ask for help.
Building a Supportive Community of Work From Home Parents
Connecting with other work from home parents can provide you with valuable support, advice, and encouragement. Join online communities or forums where you can share your experiences, ask questions, and learn from others. Attend virtual or in-person meetups for work from home parents in your area. This can provide you with opportunities to socialize, network, and build friendships. Sharing your challenges and successes with others who understand what you’re going through can be incredibly helpful for reducing stress and preventing burnout.
Don’t Forget About Your Partner
If you have a partner, make sure you’re working together as a team to manage work and family responsibilities. Communicate openly about your individual needs and challenges, and collaborate on finding solutions that work for both of you. Divide household chores and childcare responsibilities fairly. Schedule regular date nights or “us” time, even if it’s just for a few minutes each day. Remind each other of the importance of your relationship and why you chose to be together in the first place. Remind them of their commitment to you, and you to them. Work from home parenting can cause a schism in your home if not taken seriously.
Embracing Imperfection and Celebrating Small Wins
Work from home parenting is not about being perfect. It’s about doing your best and embracing the messiness of life. Don’t beat yourself up over mistakes or setbacks. Learn from them, and move on, and celebrate your small wins and accomplishments. Did you get a promotion? Did your child finally learn to tie their shoes? Acknowledge these successes, and use them to fuel your motivation and inspiration. The little things add up. They make the big problems easier to handle.
Leveraging Technology Wisely
There are many technology tools that can help you manage work and family responsibilities. Use calendar apps to schedule your work tasks, childcare activities, and personal appointments. Utilize task management apps to track your to-do list and prioritize your work. Explore productivity apps to help you stay focused and organized. Consider using video conferencing tools for meetings and collaboration. The possibilities are endless. Take the time to explore the options and find the tools that work best for you. Be careful with tech tools, however. You don’t want to waste time on things that are useless or are a distraction.
Planning for the Unexpected
Life is unpredictable, and unexpected events can happen at any time. Have a backup plan in place for when your children get sick, your babysitter cancels, or your internet goes down. This might involve having a list of backup childcare providers, a stash of ready-to-eat meals, or a portable Wi-Fi hotspot. Being prepared for the unexpected can help you stay calm and minimize stress when things don’t go according to plan. When things invariably go wrong, remain cool and call upon the plans you already have in place to solve the problem. That’s why it’s also very important to have a family member or friend who can help when problems arise.
Building Resilience: Bouncing Back From Setbacks
Resilience is the ability to bounce back from setbacks and challenges. Developing your resilience is essential for work from home parenting. Practice self-compassion and be kind to yourself. Acknowledge your strengths and accomplishments. Focus on what you can control, and let go of what you can’t. Seek support from your network of friends, family, and colleagues. Engage in activities that bring you joy and help you relax. Remember that setbacks are temporary and that you have the strength to overcome them. It isn’t about being strong. It’s about being brave and facing the challenges head-on.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: How do I deal with frequent interruptions from my kids during work hours?
A: Create a designated “quiet time” with engaging activities. Use a “do not disturb” signal. Teach children to respect your work time through consistent reinforcement and positive rewards when they follow instructions. Schedule breaks to give them attention and address their needs proactively.
Q: What if my kids are too young to understand the concept of work?
A: For very young children, short bursts of focused work are ideal. Make playdates or childcare for a limited time is effective. For toddlers, engaging toys and a baby-proofed space can provide time to work, but frequent checks are necessary.
Q: How can I convince my employer I’m productive while working from home with kids?
A: Over-communicate and proactively share updates on your work. Set clear expectations with your team about your availability. Deliver high-quality work consistently and demonstrate your commitment to the company’s goals.
Q: What if I feel guilty about not being a “perfect” parent or employee?
A. Acknowledge that you can’t do everything perfectly. Set more reasonable expectations for yourself. Remind yourself that you are working, and so you can’t be responsible for everything. Focus on the wins that will help you become great, and slowly the guilt will be less and less.
Q: My partner and I are both working from home. How do we share childcare responsibilities fairly?
A: Have a candid discussion about each other’s workloads and schedules. Assign blocks of time for each of you to be primarily responsible for childcare. Consider creating a detailed schedule to ensure equitable workload distribution.
Q: What do I do when my boss asks me to come into the office, but I don’t have child care?
A: Be upfront and honest with your boss. Explain the situation and work to find solutions to address the need to be in the office: see if being at the office at a different time is possible, ask the boss to come up with options, or consider taking time off.
References
Pew Research Center. “How the Coronavirus Outbreak Has — and Hasn’t — Changed the Way Americans Work.” 2020.
Stanford University. “Working From Home Research.” 2021.
You’ve read this far; you’re clearly committed to navigating the work from home life with kids! This guide is designed to be a resource, but real change comes from action.
Implement just one strategy this week. Pick the area where you know you can improve, establish a schedule, and review it at the end of the week. Did it work? Keep it and move on to the next step. Start small. Set yourself on a path toward building a sustainable and satisfying work from home routine. You are not alone.