Working from home with kids? Need a few minutes of peace to tackle that deadline, attend a meeting, or just breathe? You’re not alone! These calm time hacks are designed to help you steal back a little sanity and give your kids a chance to recharge too.
Understanding Calm Time: What Exactly is It?
Calm time isn’t the same as time-out or punishment. It’s a designated period – usually 15-30 minutes – where your child engages in quiet, independent activities. The goal? To allow them to de-stress, regulate their emotions, and practice self-soothing. This is crucial when you’re trying to juggle work from home with the demands of parenthood. Think of it as a reset button for everyone. It benefits them, and it definitely benefits you while you balance work and family under one roof.
Why should you care? Studies show that consistent calm time can reduce tantrums, improve focus, and even boost creativity in children. A study published in the Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry found that children who regularly practice mindfulness and quiet activities show improved emotional regulation. And let’s be honest, fewer tantrums and meltdowns equal more productive work from home sessions!
Setting Up Your Kid’s Calm Time Station
First, you need a dedicated space. It doesn’t have to be an entire room (though that would be amazing!). A corner of the living room, a designated area in their bedroom, or even a comfy spot under the dining room table can work. The key is consistency – always use the same space for calm time.
Next, fill the space with calming activities. Think beyond screens! Here are some ideas:
Books: A stack of picture books, chapter books (if they’re old enough), or even magazines.
Art Supplies: Crayons, colored pencils, paper, paint, playdough, stickers – let their creativity flow.
Sensory Bin: Fill a bin with rice, beans, pasta, or water beads and add small toys or scoops. This is great for tactile exploration. (Just supervise younger children closely).
Puzzles: Jigsaw puzzles, brain teasers, or construction toys like LEGOs.
Quiet Toys: Dolls, stuffed animals, or small cars.
Audiobooks or Calming Music: A CD player or tablet with pre-downloaded audiobooks or calming music.
Weighted Blanket or Stuffed Animal: These can provide a sense of security and comfort.
The goal is to offer a variety of activities to keep them engaged and interested during their calm time. Rotate the activities regularly to prevent boredom.
Implementing Calm Time: Establishing the Routine
Consistency is king! Choose a time of day that works best for your family’s schedule. Many parents find that right after lunch, before naps, or in the late afternoon are good times for calm time.
Before you launch, explain the concept to your child. Use simple language they understand. For example, “Calm time is a special time where we all get to be quiet and do our own things. It helps us feel relaxed and happy.”
Start small. Don’t expect your child to sit quietly for 30 minutes on the first try. Begin with 5-10 minutes and gradually increase the time as they get used to it. Visual timers are extremely helpful so your child knows when calm time ends!
Provide clear expectations. Before quiet time starts, tell your kids what you expect. For example: “During quiet time, please stay in your room. You can play with your toys, read, or draw. I will come check on you after 30 minutes.”
Resist the urge to jump in and “rescue” your child if they fuss a bit. Give them a chance to figure things out on their own. The more they practice independent play, the better they’ll become at it. It’s especially crucial to be consistent when you need to focus on work from home. Try not to give in if they complain the first few times!
Troubleshooting Common Calm Time Challenges
“My child refuses to participate!” This is a common problem! Try making calm time more appealing. Let your child help choose the activities. Use a fun visual timer (like a sand timer or a timer with a picture of a favorite character). Offer positive reinforcement – praise them for their efforts, even if they only last a few minutes.
“My child constantly interrupts me while I’m trying to work!” Gentle reminders and consistent enforcement are key. Remind them that it’s calm time and that you need some quiet time to work. If they continue to interrupt, you might need to revisit the expectations and consequences. A simple consequence could be shortening their playtime later in the day if they violate the calm time rules. Ensure, as well, they understand that work from home is your work.
“My child says they’re bored!” This is an opportunity to teach them how to handle boredom in a productive way. Remind them of all the activities available in their calm time station. If they’re truly desperate, suggest they get a new activity from the box. Some parents have a box of “special” calm time activities that are only used during that time. This can add an element of novelty and excitement.
“My child suddenly needs me for everything during calm time!” It’s almost like they sense when you need to focus! Before calm time begins, make sure they have everything they need – a drink, a snack, a trip to the bathroom. This can minimize the number of interruptions. If they do need something urgent, tell them you’ll be there as soon as you finish what you’re doing.
“My other child (or children) is constantly disrupting!” If you have multiple children, it can be tricky to manage calm time. Ideally, each child should have their own calm time station. If that’s not possible, you may need to separate them during calm time – one in their bedroom, one in the living room, etc. It’s important to teach them how respect the others’ space and time.
Beyond Toys: Other Tools for Calm
While toys and activities are the foundation of calm time, you can also incorporate other calming tools:
Breathing Exercises: Teach your child simple breathing exercises, such as “belly breathing.” Have them lie down, put their hands on their stomach, and take slow, deep breaths, feeling their stomach rise and fall.
Mindfulness Activities: There are many age-appropriate mindfulness activities available online or in books. These activities encourage children to focus on the present moment and notice their thoughts and feelings without judgment.
Nature Sounds or White Noise: Playing calming nature sounds or white noise can help to block out distracting noises and create a more peaceful environment.
Positive Affirmations: Teach your child to repeat positive affirmations, such as “I am calm,” “I am brave,” or “I am loved.” This can help to boost their self-esteem and promote a sense of well-being.
The Benefits of Consistency
Remember, calm time is an investment. It takes time and effort to establish the routine, but the benefits are well worth it. Not only will you gain some much-needed quiet time to focus on work from home, but your child will also develop valuable self-regulation skills that will benefit them throughout their life.
Statistics clearly show the advantages of calm time and mindfulness. Studies show its effect on children’s social and emotional well being. As a working parent, you’re likely juggling many items so the more routine you instill in your household the easier your life will be.
Keeping Yourself Calm, Too!
It’s easy to get caught up in the stress of managing work and kids. Remember to take care of yourself too! During your child’s calm time, take a few minutes for yourself. Meditate, do some stretching, read a book, or simply enjoy a cup of tea in peace. You deserve it!
Don’t feel guilty for taking personal time. It’s what keeps you sane as you work from home!
FAQ: Your Calm Time Questions Answered
How young is too young for calm time?
There’s no magic age, but most experts suggest introducing calm time around the age of 2 or 3. A toddler’s attention span is short, so start with very brief periods (2-3 minutes) and gradually increase the time as they get older.
What if my child has separation anxiety?
If your child struggles with separation anxiety, start slow and gradually increase the distance between you. You might begin by sitting in the same room with them during calm time and then gradually move further away over time. Let them know you are nearby!
How do I handle calm time when we’re traveling?
Pack a special “travel calm time kit” with a few favorite toys and activities. You can use a hotel room, a plane seat, or even a car ride for calm time. Audiobooks are especially useful during travel.
Is it okay to use screens during calm time?
While screens can be a tempting option, try to limit them and focus on other activities. Excessive screen time can be overstimulating and counteract the benefits of calm time. If you do use screens, choose educational apps or calming videos.
What if calm time just isn’t working for us?
Every child is different, and what works for one family may not work for another. Don’t be afraid to experiment with different approaches and activities until you find what works best for your child. You might need to adjust the time of day, the location, or the activities. Maybe calm time isn’t the answer, and a 15-minute dance party is something you can all enjoy until you need more quiet. The choice is yours!
What can I do If I have a baby and a toddler?
This is a really tricky one, but you can aim to align the baby’s nap with the toddler’s calm time.. If this isn’t possible, you can babywear and get the baby to doze whilst playing with the older child, or try keeping the baby near so you can supervise all. There is no perfect answer, sadly!
Should I reward calm time?
Avoid using rewards as the main motivator. Rewards are unsustainable. Instead, focus on praise and positive reinforcement. If a child can relate calm time to more overall freedom, that is more rewarding than stickers or sweets.
How do I know if calm time is working?
You’ll likely notice a decrease in tantrums, improved focus, and a more cooperative attitude in your child. You’ll also (hopefully!) find that you have more uninterrupted time to focus on work from home… and yourself! Don’t feel guilty for taking personal time. It’s what keeps you sane as you work from home!